Funny Wedding Wishes, Messages and Quotes

Wedding can be pretty stressful, so why not lighten up the mood by sending some funny wedding wishes to your close and dear ones? Wish them onward madness and craziness together. Congratulating the newly married couple by sending some funny wedding messages will be a way to add humor to the occasion. Don’t forget to give them your blessings and best wishes for all the fights they are signing up for in their lifetime. Here are some funny wedding wishes you can send to your best friend, siblings, cousins, or colleagues on this joyous occasion. Enjoy the magical day and bless them with your presence and funny yet heartwarming congratulatory words.

Funny Wedding Wishes For Bride or Groom

Best of luck for your lifetime suffering. Have peace with each other. Congratulations!

Congratulations on convincing yourself to settle down. May the crazy days start!

Life is a roller coaster ride. But now you have someone to scream with you along the ride. Congratulations!

I am happy that you are married now. Congratulations for being expensively stupid.

Funny Wedding Wishes

Thank you so much for giving us a day to chill. Today is a wonderful day to be married! Congrats.

I am so happy to see you two get married! May your expiry date be infinity and your arguments be the opposite.

I’ll tell you the secret of a happy marriage. It remains… a secret to all! Wishing you all the best for the times ahead!

Congratulations and best of luck on continuing to ignore the little annoying things.

I knew you two were madly in love with each other, but I didn’t think you’d be mad enough to get married. Have a great life ahead.

Congratulations to you on your wedding! Remember this date for the rest of your life if only you don’t want to be the one who forgets their anniversaries and gets bitten by their spouse.

Wishing you a delightful wedding and welcoming a world full of new and endless responsibilities!

I hope you have a wonderful wedding and a playful first night sharing your bed or couch or anything you want. 😉

No amount of wishes or luck will protect you from the painful life of slavery you are about to start as a husband. Congratulations anyway.

Two become One: one bed, one remote, one bathroom! Congratulations on your union as life partners!

You are actually shown some respect when priests ask you to say ‘I do’. Else it’s not that you have any other choice either. Happy Married Life Ahead!

Your laughter will be dead, Your rejoicing will be nullified. There’s going to be just one voice at home now, And that is of your wife’s. Happy married life!

I would like to send you my best wishes on your lifelong contract. Congratulations!

funny wedding wishes for best friend

Hope you will not grow up just because now you are married. Have a blessed and happy life.

I wish you happiness and joy at your wedding! I cannot wait to hear gossip about your marriage. I won’t reveal anything. Don’t worry.

Congratulations on getting married! I hope you two are looking forward to a fun honeymoon already because weddings are stressful.

Funny Wishes For Newly Married Couple

May your marriage be long-lasting, like the battery life on your favorite devices. Keep charging the love, and may your connection never experience any problem. Congrats to you both!

You die twice in life. The first one is special because, in this one, you pay for your funeral. Happy wedding!

Marriage is special, just like a play of Shakespeare. Not for the romance and the comedy, but for the tragedy. Congratulations!

If you are not doing it right this time, remember, you’re not going to get a next time to do it right. Congratulations on your wedding!

Congratulations on your wedding, may you always be able to put up with each other!

Marriage is about taking a vow to complete each other only to find out later that you’re about to finish off each other. Happy wedding to both of you!

Nothing gets better after marriage. It’s only the beginning of the worst. Congratulations anyway!

You’ve been alive for so long for absolutely no reason. I think it’s perfect time you chose to die for a reason. Congratulations!

When there is a problem, we solve it. When there isn’t a problem (being single), we create one (Marriage) and then solve it. Human nature is so complex! Congratulations!

Happy wedding to the precious couple! Be sure to change your marital status on your social media.

A couple’s life cycle consists of various stages: dating, loving, marrying, fighting, threatening, and possibly even divorcing. Congratulations on reaching step number three.

I wish for your love to be unbreakable like the Wi-Fi connection and enduring like grandma’s secret recipe. Here’s to a lifetime of laughter, love, and happily-ever-after moments!

As you begin this adventure called marriage, may your days be bright like a rainbow, your disagreements quick like a text message, and your love story sweet like chocolate. Good luck!

May your married life be epic and entertaining like a rom-com movie but with much less drama! Congrats on a lifetime filled with love, joy, and happily ever after.

Funny Wedding Wishes for Friend

Just wanted to remind you that deaf husbands and blind wives make the best pairs. Hope you have a great married life with your partner. Sending you all my best wishes, mate.

Dear friend, congratulations on getting married for real. Hope you speak now or forever hold your peace! May God be with you throughout all the bumpy rides.

Good luck to my best friend! Remember, marriage is like a Netflix series—sometimes you binge-watch, sometimes you need a break, but it’s always worth it. Congrats!

Good wishes to my best friend! May your marriage be filled with laughter, understanding, and more fun than a weekend getaway. Remember, love is the best adventure—enjoy the ride together!

Hope you stay madly in love, just don’t get ‘mad’ in this marriage. Best wishes for the crazy, wonderful, and dangerous world of “marriage”. Sending my prayers.

I’m not sure if you’re trying to fit into the rule of society or trying to rush to death for being rejected by it. Good luck with your new life anyway. Happy wedding!

Deep inside, you know it’s a trap, and you’re not coming out of it alive. Just kidding. Congratulations on your wedding!

Congratulations my best friend. I am really happy that you have found the person you want to annoy for the rest of your life and be happy about it. Love you two so much.

In the circus of life, you may have lived like a lion so far. But your wife, the new circus master will tame you into a domesticated cat in no time. Good luck with your tight rope act.

Congratulations for embarking on life’s journey called MARRIAGE which is either a two way street between COMPROMISE and SACRIFICE or a one way street to DIVORCE.

funny marriage wishes

There is nothing worse than a friend getting married. Now my parents have one more reason to coax me into getting married. Congratulations.

Congrats, my friend! May your marriage be a masterpiece, painted with love strokes and sprinkled with humor. Like our friendship, may it stand the test of time. Happy forever after!

I canceled all my appointments and an important meeting just so that I could make it to your wedding. After all, free food and booze were just too lucrative to give up. Congratulations.

At last, you’ve found someone to laugh at your stupid jokes. She’s totally your type, my friend. Congratulation to you!

Well, now it’s the beginning of the end for you. No more beers, no more night out with the guys but at least you have a loving wife. Congrats!

Do you know what late nights, parties and hanging out with friends on the weekend have in common? You won’t be able to do any of those from now on. Congratulations for your wedding.

Read More: Wedding Wishes For Friend

Funny Wedding Wishes for Brother

I hope you enjoy the circus of this lifetime and make sure to squeeze the fun out of it. Stay in love, stay married. Also- remember to SCREAM whenever it is needed. Love you tons.

funny wedding wishes for brother

We are so proud that you chose the right one. It’s her who made a mistake in her life. I feel genuinely bad for her. Congratulations to you anyway!

May you enjoy your epic sleepover with your person for the rest of your life. I pray to God to keep both of you safe from each other. Have a great life together. Love you.

Marriage marks the end of a love story and the start of a wrestling match. Wishing you the very best of everything anyway.

No one’s ever able to find out a secret about happy married life. I guess it doesn’t even exist. Happy Married Life Brother ;)!

I am so happy to hand you over to your new babysitter. I was so worried all the time; now I feel better. Just kidding! Happy wedding!

You wouldn’t want to marry if you were not stupid. Proved again! Congratulations and never mind!

Surviving a marriage is so easy. You have to play dead and deaf for the rest of your life. Here’s a tip from your elder brother. Good luck!

Congrats, bro! May your marriage be rock-solid like our secret handshake and sweet like mom’s cookies. I wish you a lifetime of laughter, love, and shared adventures.

Funny Wedding Wishes for Sister

I still cannot believe someone willingly married you. Sending all my best wishes and condolences for him to tolerate you 24*7. Hope you have fun together. Love yaa.

Hope you have fun at your personalized wrestling match for life. Best wishes, guys. May God bless you two together and be with you, always. Love you a lot.

There is nothing called happiness or sadness. It’s all in our heads. Try to use your head more often than your hands! Happy wedding!

You are so excited to always make your partner happy and loved. Then you will find out that you did nothing but annoy each other instead. Congratulations!

funny wishes for newly married couple

You’re so good at cooking. It’s time to train him to become a chef. Congratulations, my dear sister!

Wishing you a happy marriage good luck for the war to come. May the best player win!

If marriage came with a terms and conditions list, I’m sure he wouldn’t marry you. I was just kidding! Wishing you a happy marriage life!

He’s all yours from today. If he doesn’t keep you happy, kill him in his sleep. Just kidding! Happy wedding!

Maybe your “I do” will not cost you- your sanity. Have fun in your married life. Sending my best wishes to both of you in surviving life. May God bless you, dear.

Getting married is like becoming a child all over again. Be prepared to learn where to put your towel, how to keep the bathroom clean, and organizing your clothes in the closet. Congratulations.

To my dearest sister, remember marriage is like a roller coaster – thrilling, with turns and twists, and best enjoyed with someone screaming beside you. Enjoy the ride!

Dear sister, may your marriage be filled with more joy than a surprise three-day weekend! Remember, love is like Wi-Fi connections – it has ups and downs, but it’s always worth the reconnection. Congrats!

Read More: Wedding Wishes For Sister

Funny Wedding Wishes for Colleague

Best wishes on finding your forever desk mate, sorry! Soulmate! May your marriage be supportive like our team. Enjoy wedded bliss!

I hope God bless you with an amazing memory to remember all the important dates and not make your partner angry. Sending my best wishes at your marriage life, mate.

Congratulations! Now you have a boss at home too! Let us know who yells at you harder. Happy wedding!

Thank you so much for the free food and drinks, I will always say my prayers to God for you. May He bless you at the beginning of the end for you. Congratulations, and good luck with everything.

Congratulations on your wedding day… I haven’t bothered buying you both a present. It would just be something else to fight over when you get divorced!

In life, we should always keep our eyes wide open. However, after marriage, it‘s better to close them! Congratulations and Good Luck!

Do you know that you are signing a marriage contract that does not give you the option of renewing it every year! Congratulations on signing your life away.

funny wishes for newly married couple

From now on, no matter how early you reach home after office, you’ll be late. Just reminding you about what you’ve signed up for. Congratulations!

Congratulation on being officially married. And I hope you know everything official has their own set of rules. Good luck with following those!

It’s all about communication to fix all the problems. She communicates, and you fix her problems. That’s how a happy marriage works, after all. Congratulations!

To the power couple of the office! May your marriage be dynamic like our brainstorming sessions and sweet like the treats in the breakroom. Congrats, colleague!

Funny Wedding Quotes

“A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.” – Zsa Zsa Gabor

“Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” – Erma Bombeck

“Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia? The mafia wants either your money or life! Wives want both!”

“This is what I have to say to you. You are a very brave soul who will endure the marriage life and become better than all of us. Godspeed my friend. We got your back.”


“Before you got married, you were madly in love with each other. Now you will’be mad at each other as well.”

“Marriage is when a man loses his bachelor’s degree and a woman gets her master’s degree.”

“There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage.” – James Holt McGavran

“The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.” – Groucho Marx

“Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain’t so hot.” – Minnie Pearl

“Marriage: A legal or religious ceremony by which two persons of the opposite sex solemnly agree to harass and spy on each other for ninety-nine years, or until death do them join.” – Elbert Hubbard

“Love seems the swiftest but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.” – Mark Twain

“I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one’s wife happy. First, let her think she’s having her own way. And second, let her have it.” – Lyndon B. Johnson

“Getting married is like being in drama school. You get to practice everything from comedy to melodrama to tragedy. Congratulations.”

Must Read: 150+ Wedding Congratulations Messages

Some witty quotes and laughing off at them is the easiest escape from the stress one can be had from all the wedding preparation. Send some remarkably funny wedding wishes and make them enjoy their day to the fullest. Send them your warm wishes and good luck messages on their new job AKA being married. Wish them to have a happy married life no matter what. Send some silly and funny wedding messages to make them sure you are happy for them. Show them how happy you are on their new journey. Enjoy the food and do not forget to give them some presents. Enjoy the wedding and help them enjoy it from the best point of view.